The Word Cloud - Writing Community - Help and advice for writers

34 Comments

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  by Marion 1 month ago

  I'm in stitches.
• 

  by Eshka 1 month ago

  Oops. I hope they're the dissolving kind.
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  by Valkia 1 month ago

  wow! this is written in the native tongue of my people! When were you ever in dagenham?
• 

  by Marion 1 month ago

  :-D I hope not. They're the only things holding me together.
• 

  by Weens 1 month ago

  I'll take a dozen
• 

  by Eshka 1 month ago

  Dear god woman, staple guns are so much more cost effective - DIY repair.
  
  Valkia - I iz lak, so down with ma bitches an' ma homeboys iz lak no even real. I sumtimes fink I musta been foun' unda a moss stone, man, lak me mam sez. I iz da wind dat shakes da barlay, dey seek 'im 'ere, dey seek 'im der. I iz a Nigma.
• 

  by Marion 1 month ago

  Hahaha, you sound like Buckwheat. Staple gun! Of course! Why didn't I think of that?
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  by Eshka 1 month ago

  I have several, in a variety of finishes ranging from metallic green to shiny, shiny black. You can have one if you ask nicely. I keep them handy, I like my balls with metal attached. It's good for the teeth.
• 

  by Mook 1 month ago

  They say you can hide your true self behind the Net, but it's nice when someones true identity comes out. I'm so pleased you decided to reveal your real side Eshka.
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  by Eshka 1 month ago

  Iz lak wen I crawled outta da woom boy! S'all nu and lak....nu. I feel I iz wit ma cronies 'ere, I can 'av a scratch an' pik me nose. Dun even matta if I lak blow off, even if iz a real stankfest, cuz I no I iz luv'd.
• 

  by Caducean Whisks 1 month ago

  You forgot the hyperlink! Where can I buy some? I neeeed some of those bin bags, like NOW!
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  by Mook 1 month ago

  Oh, I understand you perfectly, Eshka. Within these Cloud walls you can act without fear of retribution. I think you deserve a round of applause for 'coming out.' Let the Cloud be your bubble, and abubble where you can talk in your native tongue. We, as Cloudets, will provide you with a santuary. Hell, we'll even help you with you writing - but make sure you ask one of the more respectable adults. I is just an amateur.
• 

  by Eshka 1 month ago

  Eeeeeeeasy wuman, I iz in Un-datified wif orders! Iz mad lak, I fawt I'd 'av to flog 'em off da bak of ma dad's transit lak dem propa conboys. Only I iz legit. 2 legit 2 quit, innit! Aaaaaayyyyyyyyeeee! *finger snap*
  
  Oh, wot iz hyperlink? Lak sum mad bint on speed? Iz too 'spensif man. I lak a trip yo but I get ma trippin' off laf, ya dig?
• 

  by Marion 1 month ago

  Balls of steel!
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  by Eshka 1 month ago

  Writin? I neva sed no shiz 'bout writin' man. I iz floggin' ma cre-ay-shuns. Gonna hit up ma bitch Gordon Brown an' lak get him to indoors me coz I iz all 'bout bein' green. I iz runnin' for MP yo. He iz deffo gonna lak me wen I givvim a taste o'ma maaaaagik, innit.
• 

  by Eshka 1 month ago

  Yeeeeah dis one KNOWS it! Dam rite Mazza, I gots no bling fo' ma ding so I hooked masel' up wit yo British Class A Industrial Supa-Strong Steel. An' now I iz hung.
• 

  by Marion 1 month ago

  HAHAHA - that reminds me of a poem: Mary had a little lamb, its balls were made of brass. And everytime they clanged together, sparks flew out its arse.
• 

  by Mook 1 month ago

  Another revelation - First a lady, then the native tongue.....and now balls of steel. I'm gonna hazard a guess, but are you a...you know...one of them who has had a sex-change. I'm open minded, so feel free to enlighten us further.
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  by Eshka 1 month ago

  I don' do sparks. I iz lak ABLAZE when I is doin' ma thing down da street. Iz lak a welder's wet dream.
• 

  by Eshka 1 month ago

  An' no man. I iz jus' unlucky in dat area, yo. Iz all about lak, makin' da most outta wat yo mama gave ya. An' dat ho was meeeean. I izn't even got no short n curlees but saves me da reddies from 'avin no groomin' 'spenses. Da ho's lak me smoov.
• 

  by Mook 1 month ago

  To save confusion, Eshka will now be referred to as 'it.' It saves her/him and us deciphering.
• 

  by Eshka 1 month ago

  I prefer 'izzit', Mook. It has more character.
• 

  by Mook 1 month ago

  Accepted, but to save typing time, I'll call you by the shortened version of 'zit.'
• 

  by Eshka 1 month ago

  Yes you may. I think I can approve of that. I am irresistably squeezable and full of crap.
• 

  by Mook 1 month ago

  If you're squeezed, does you head pop off?
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  by Eshka 1 month ago

  Christ, all the time. It's a hazardous condition. That's the real story behind how my boyfriend broke his leg. He hugged me too hard, so my head popped like a cork and went lolloping along the floor. He chased after it, screaming like a pig, but it ricocheted off the stairs and tripped him up. It was a Basil Fawlty moment, only with gore.
• 

  by Eshka 1 month ago

  I should add - this is another reason to keep a staple gun in the house.
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  by Mook 1 month ago

  Stapleguns. A wonderful invention. Works just as well on a woman's mouth....should the need arise.
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  by Eshka 1 month ago

  You don't need to use a staple gun to shut a woman up. All you have to do is tell her she's fat.
• 

  by Mook 1 month ago

  But telling her this is runs the risk of hours of crying and a potential slap.
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  by Eshka 1 month ago

  Hm. Well. If that's the case then what you need to get is a soundproof room with a lock on the outside of the door. Apparently empty egg boxes are brilliant.
• 

  by Mook 1 month ago

  Eggs boxes are brilliant. They hold eggs.
  
  Another method is the legendary hit and run. Name call and then leg it out the house to a safe distance.
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  by Eshka 1 month ago

  Ah, flaw! You leave behind your most prized possessions. Now I am not this way inclined myself, but I do find it amusing what some women do - and this is a good one. My kids' dad has an ex who, upon getting turned down by him for marriage (he ran from the house when she asked), took her dad's Black & Decker to all of his cds. They all ended up with two big sad empty eyes.
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  by Grace Wastelands 29 days ago

  Itz all bou' respeck 2 da e-male!